A provocative question has emerged from a trending online discussion: “Why did people even get married if cheating is so prevalent?” This sentiment reflects the disillusionment many feel about the state of modern marriages, where infidelity seems to have become alarmingly common. But what’s really happening behind closed doors in these relationships?
The Rise of Infidelity: A Symptom or the Norm?
From the outside, marriage is often viewed as the ultimate commitment—a bond built on love, trust, and partnership. Yet, countless stories of married individuals engaging in extramarital affairs suggest that something deeper may be at play.
- 👑Ke Mosotho👑 (@Brian_Thee_MVP): “You’ll fear marriage the way married people cheat. A lot of married men date multiple women more than unmarried men.”
- Thandoe (@Nothando_Cele85): “It’s not only men... married women cheat more than men. But they’re discreet, so you’ll never notice.”
These observations raise questions about whether infidelity stems from unmet needs, societal pressures, or deeper dissatisfaction within marriages.
Why Get Married in the First Place?
The thread also touched on the reasons people choose to get married, many of which appear to be rooted in convenience rather than genuine commitment.
- Ntsundu (@Ntsundu_): “People get married for convenience, not for commitment.”
- Msentie (@Msentie2): “I never had one partner before marriage, and now it’s not easy for me to change because I’m married.”
For some, marriage is about societal validation or financial stability, while for others, it’s a personal milestone. But when these foundations are shallow, cracks can quickly appear, leading to infidelity and broken trust.
Polygamy vs. Monogamy: Are Expectations Misaligned?
The debate also delved into whether monogamy is realistic in modern relationships. Some argued that the root cause of cheating could be unrealistic expectations of fidelity.
- Dewa (@mandlabafo): “Men were not created to be monogamous. It’s best to be straight with your partner that you are a polygamist. In polygamy, there is hardly a divorce.”
- Edwin Uber (@Ed_UberDriver): “Yeah, I think people should be given a choice. Have these conversations with people you wanna get married to and agree.”
While polygamy is often seen as an alternative that minimizes cheating, critics argue that it’s not a one-size-fits-all solution. For many, the issue lies not in the structure of the relationship but in a lack of honesty and communication.
The Emotional Toll of Infidelity
Married people and cheating, what's really going on in those marriages? Why did people even get married? 🤦🏾♂️
— Edwin Uber (@Ed_UberDriver) December 10, 2024
- Tilly (@Tillyies): “Men normalized cheating so women just got to a point where they’re also like, ‘f**k it.’ Nobody had an issue with it when it was just men though.”
- Edwin Uber (@Ed_UberDriver): “We’re honestly moving weird.”
What Can Be Done?
The conversation leaves us with a critical question: How can marriages be strengthened to avoid the pervasive issue of cheating?
- Honest Conversations: Open communication about expectations and needs is essential before and during marriage.
- Redefining Commitment: Partners need to align their definitions of commitment and work towards mutual goals.
- Seeking Help: Couples counseling and therapy can provide tools to navigate challenges and rebuild trust.
A Final Reflection
While marriage remains a cornerstone of society, the normalization of infidelity highlights a need to reevaluate what it means to commit to a lifelong partnership. Are people rushing into marriage for the wrong reasons? Are traditional expectations of monogamy outdated in modern society?
The answers may differ for each individual, but one thing is clear: the current state of marriage demands more honesty, reflection, and intentionality from everyone involved.
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