Helena Morrissey advices women to not see having children as a setback for them; in fact there is no perfect time to have kids

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Helena Morrissey: Getty Images

The best time to start a family is not just about age or life stage, but some considerations may help navigate pregnancy and maternity leave successfully at any stage of life. The author shares their experience of having their first child when they were 25 and a graduate trainee and their last as a 42-year-old CEO. They were naive when they had their first child, but they realised they couldn't afford childcare options and had to earn more money.


The author was eligible for a promotion when they returned from maternity leave but was told there was doubt over their commitment to a baby. This stressful time was the making of their career, and missing out on that promotion left them furious and disappointed. They found another job with a firm that didn't just offer a higher salary but whose founder, Stewart Newton, welcomed people who were "different" because he believed that multiple perspectives were vital to making the best decisions.


Morrissey's image via Getty Images


It's not when you have a baby but whether your company's culture and manager's approach are supportive. A clue can lie in the maternity and paternity benefits. Newton offered enhanced maternity pay right from when the author joined the firm, and the (male) head of HR made it clear that they didn't need to work for two years to be eligible.


Aviva led the charge by offering six months' fully paid leave to both mothers and fathers since 2017. The company said that the most productive, loyal employees were happy, and they recognised that for many, happiness involved family. The average paternity leave increased from four weeks to five months, helping the firm retain and attract talent in a tight labour market.


Perhaps most importantly, there was a more level playing field between men and women wanting to start a family. Other companies have followed suit, although equal paid leave is still the norm.


The article discusses the issue of women being passed over for promotion after having a child despite legislation designed to protect women. "Pregnant Then Screwed" is an organisation that helps women who have suffered discrimination during pregnancy, maternity leave, or on their return to work. Its 2022 report is depressing, citing an estimated 54,000 women losing their jobs yearly in the UK "simply for getting pregnant." The UK still has one of the world's most expensive and inadequate childcare systems, with research showing that someone on a £40,000 salary would need a £24,000 pay rise to cover the cost of childcare for just one child.


The author shares two stories of ambitious women who handled their maternity leave brilliantly. One had her first child at 40 and came to see the author just before the baby was due. She planned to take six months' leave, then return three days a week for the first six months before going full-time again. Her pitch was perfect, and she and her boss left the company.


The other woman was a brilliant fund manager who was eight months pregnant with her first child and wanted to give her a flagship fund to run. She was delighted and insisted on taking on the fund straightaway to make changes ahead of her leave. This meant telling clients and introducing her to their new manager immediately.


The author suggests that women should understand the firm's culture, work for a great boss, stay in control of the narrative, use "stay in touch" days to avoid being "out of sight, out of mind," and communicate effectively. The author also shares her experience of being passed over for promotion after having a child, highlighting the importance of understanding the firm's culture and staying in control of the narrative.


The reassurance to many young women who ask for advice on this topic because they are very anxious. They are worried about money, worried about the dismal statistics, concerned about what might happen next month, next year, next decade. 


They should try to take it one step at a time. There will be difficult moments, but there will be great joy, too.  Helena wouldn’t change a thing – even the intense financial struggles after having her first son.


However, she declares that if you want children, borrow the famous Nike slogan, “Just do it”.


This article is republished from The Telegraph by Helena Morrissey. Click here to read the original article. 



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